That goldmine of news, The Sun - has been running a story for Panto season. Apparently Pantomime bosses have been slammed by dwarfs for turning to cheaper child actors for their productions of Snow White.
Hayden Parker, a judge for the British Panto awards said "'It boils down to the fact that in this cost-cutting age dwarfs are expensive. "Using child actors belittles our profession" he said. So "Snow White and The Seven Dwarves", is now - technically speaking - "Snow White and the Seven Minimum-Wage Child Actors - that are Cast As Dwarves".
Panto chiefs in their defence said that there was "no need for the dwarfs to make a big thing out of it". Steve Redford, who runs the Mini Men agency, said he has stopped supplying actors to pantos because of plummeting demand. "Sadly" - he says - "demand for dwarfs is much smaller than it used to be". Could this be down to the fact that the salary for a dwarf, erm, dwarfs that - of a child actor?
A dwarf can ask for more than double the minimum recommended pay rate of £471 a week in panto. This could leave theatre production companies spending more than £10,000 a week on all seven dwarfs. Does this mean the Theatres' don't want ... "a big payroll". I guess it does, Mr Redford conceded.
I've got an idea, why don't they cast child dwarfs in the role of dwarfs? Presumably a dwarf doesn't go straight to man or womanhood; they have a spell where they're a child too. This way the theatre saves on expenditure; but the tradition of using dwarfs as dwarfs continues. It's a win-win for everyone.
Right! I'm off to the House of Commons next to solve Brexit.
PS: That reminds me; me Dad once had an accident where he backed into a dwarfs shiny new Mercedes. The dwarf got out of his car and said - 'I'm not Happy'. To which he replied, 'Which one are you then?" Woof!
Hayden Parker, a judge for the British Panto awards said "'It boils down to the fact that in this cost-cutting age dwarfs are expensive. "Using child actors belittles our profession" he said. So "Snow White and The Seven Dwarves", is now - technically speaking - "Snow White and the Seven Minimum-Wage Child Actors - that are Cast As Dwarves".
Panto chiefs in their defence said that there was "no need for the dwarfs to make a big thing out of it". Steve Redford, who runs the Mini Men agency, said he has stopped supplying actors to pantos because of plummeting demand. "Sadly" - he says - "demand for dwarfs is much smaller than it used to be". Could this be down to the fact that the salary for a dwarf, erm, dwarfs that - of a child actor?
A dwarf can ask for more than double the minimum recommended pay rate of £471 a week in panto. This could leave theatre production companies spending more than £10,000 a week on all seven dwarfs. Does this mean the Theatres' don't want ... "a big payroll". I guess it does, Mr Redford conceded.
I've got an idea, why don't they cast child dwarfs in the role of dwarfs? Presumably a dwarf doesn't go straight to man or womanhood; they have a spell where they're a child too. This way the theatre saves on expenditure; but the tradition of using dwarfs as dwarfs continues. It's a win-win for everyone.
Right! I'm off to the House of Commons next to solve Brexit.
PS: That reminds me; me Dad once had an accident where he backed into a dwarfs shiny new Mercedes. The dwarf got out of his car and said - 'I'm not Happy'. To which he replied, 'Which one are you then?" Woof!