Nice walk around Jacob Smith Park this morning, let off the lead and got up to absolutely no mischief whatsoever. No rolling, shit eating nor nothing. Came when called, jumped straight into the back of the car when requested and sat patiently in me cage whilst me Dad and the little feller went off to have their hair cut. They obviously had a fry-up as well as they brought me back a sausage for being a good boy. All in all I've been better behaved than a five year old on Christmas Eve. Still, there's always tomorrow.....

Lovely walk round Ripley this morning, soaking up all the noble majesty of the British countryside at it's magnificent spring best. Couldn't help but admire the subtle delicate splendour of the newly emerged bluebells, contrasting with the now ever so slightly over the top yellow daffodils fading gracefully away. Of course it was all lost on me Dad, all I got out of him was "you stay away from that shit or you'll feel my boot up your arse!" Then we turned the corner and saw what for me has to be one of the most stunning sights ever, a field of around twenty deer grazing peacefully away. It was a beautiful sight and one that will remain indelibly ingrained on my mind until they bury me at the foot of the garden along with Mrs Snow and Stanley the cross-dressing guinea pig. I'm quite literally choking back tears as I write this. All he said was "it's a deer farm FFS, what did you expect?" He's got absolutely no romance in him. So I squeezed out...

"Interest rates are set to quadruple within a year, adding more than £100 a month to a typical mortgage, a senior Bank of England adviser has warned. Families should brace themselves for a rate rise as officials try to get to grips with soaring inflation, said Andrew Sentance, of the Bank’s Monetary Policy Committee, says the Daily Mail." Followed by "Interest rates are likely to remain at their record low level for months to come after falling food prices brought a surprise drop in inflation. Vince Cable, the Business Secretary, openly encouraged the Bank to keep rates on hold, saying the UK economy “needs” low rates to recover, the Telegraph reports." What a load of pooh.

Nice walk around the pinewoods yesterday morning, got let off my lead and immediately rolled in fox shit, or Allure by Emporio Armani as I like to call it. Locked out of the house until teatime for some reason, the classless bastards. No sign of Julia Bradbury on CountryFile last night, and I see that another one of the lady presenters is also "in foal". It must be the sight of all them farm animals bang at it that gets them going, I reckon. Watched Antiques Roadshow, barked at the ginger kid from over the road and bedded down for the night on the settee, I don't want my basket stinking of fox shit in the morning do I? Pooh count: 6, average.