Andy Murray has reconfirmed his status as a useless Jock bastard I see. There's been a 2.9 magnitude earthquake in the Scottish Highlands overnight. Unfortunately no "Sweaty Socks" were injured. The World Cup Quarter Finals start today, with France against Germany - the rumour is that the French have surrendered already. Then after that we have Brazil against Columbia. Apparently I read that the reason that Brazil play in yellow is because it's the colour of sunshine. Nice one. I can't wait to see the new England brown shirts when they come out. Psychologists examining Oscar Pistorious have said that his mental state means that he's in danger of suicide - especially if he gets himself confused with a burglar. Seeing as he doesn't seem to have a leg to stand on, Rolf Harris has offered to lend him his extra one. Experts say that widespread gambling in Britain is driving families apart. Which isn't true in our case, since me Dad lost all our money on the...