No, not a newspaper, it's a zebra crossing the M62 on that very busy bit to the north side of Manchester. He must have escaped from the zoo, and been trying to thumb a lift back to the Serengeti.

Between red and green? Fuck all if you're a cyclist. I REALLY hate those twats. On the evolutionary scale they are on the same rung of the ladder as Morris Dancers, and we all know what a sad little gang of wankers they are. One minute they're a road user (cyclists, not fucking Morris Dancers, keep up will you) - demanding equal respect with drivers - the next they're mounting the fucking pavement to dodge the lights scattering pedestrians hither and dither. If not that then they're cycling 14 abreast down the fucking A59 in their fucking gay lycra pants. Get to high fuck in the Kindom of Fuck you fucking bum fettling bent as a nine bob note chutney ferrets.