The questions are here for the 2022-23 survey. Are you? a boy doggy a girl doggy a prefer not to say kind of doggy How would describe your colour? a white doggy a black doggy a brown doggy a black & white doggy, I'm a Dalmatian  a prefer not to say kind of doggy If you smell another doggy's bottom, would you? walk away calmly after giving a brief or perfunctory sniff give it one up the chutney prefer not to say What colour is your lead? blue pink prefer not to say What is your preferred pronoun? him/he her/she what the f**k is a pronoun? prefer not to say What is LGBT ? a kind of sandwich a load of bollocks the tail is wagging the dog prefer not to say Stay woof in 2023 you know it makes sense

I see old Mr Glow Sun Tan * has been at his modest best again. (* Isn't he the Chinese ambassador?) I've stopped 7 wars, including India vs Pakistan. Err ... Mr President there wasn't a war between India and Pakistan. There you go ! I stopped it before it even started. Then there was Ukraine v Russia ... Stopped that one in its tracks,  Yemen vs the Houtis, Israel v Palestine naturally.  England v Wales,  USA vs Canada and Mexico.  Easter Island vs Tristan Da Cunha.  War of the Roses, Lancashire v Yorkshire, you never hear about that anymore. I stopped em all, and did I get a phone call or text saying Gee Thanks? No I did not.

Benny the inspiration for Noggers Dog's Blog passed away this week at 15 y.o or 105 in human terms. God Bless him. stay forever woof

I wouldn't normally have anything to do with cats, but this is inspired. Bit like that doggy that looked like Hitler. Stay woof

More ideas for those clever telly people. Travel Man, 24 hours in Grimsby Celebrity Wallpapering My Gran, Your Grandad etc Inside the Convent Glasgow: a Binge Drinkers Paradise How to get rid of moths People who pi** in swimming pools, exposed Michael Portillo, Great Bus Rides round rural Britain Susan Calman's Celebrity Curling Cooking with Spam, top recipes Britain's top 10 dog biscuits Stay woof

Dad's been in a foul temper with all the roadworks that have popped up. They dig up the same road time after time. This time they really outshone themselves, but cutting acces to his driveway in a classic pincer move much beloved the German Panzer divisions of WW2. THEY DUG UP ROAD THE ROAD ON BOTH SIDES of his house making it impossible to get in or out.  Then they dug a trench and put up barriers. I'm amazed they didn't mine it and cover with trip wire. He spoke to them and asked "why they had to dig up this road yet again". "It's been dug more time than the Valley of the Kings" - ok these may not the exact words he used. They replied that they hadn't worked on that as it wasn't in their area. FFS, stay woof