There's deffo something wrong with him, I think he may have oldtimers disease or summat. The news was on tonight right, and it's all about Japan, and he's going "blimey, look at the arse on that!" In the middle of a crisis, that's all he can think about. He's sick in the head. It was the same with Haiti last year, he's going "get yer head out of the way Mark Mardell, look at her baps!" Pooh count: six, a fair effort on the day.
You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.