OK, so I did muddy the lounge carpet a bit, but what is their problem? The tight bastards? You know, I mean there's all these problems going on in the world, like Egyptian unrest and a global sausage shortage and that, but come on, give me a break. Did you see that Gypsy Wedding thing last night? Lordy, Lordy. Are those girls for real or what? Even so did you see the raspberries on that Jack Russell?
You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.