Sometimes it's a bit boring being a dog. We have to make our own amusement in a back to basics "jumpers for goalposts" kind of a way. Today's fun was pissing on the kitchen floor in the middle of the night underneath the kitchen table. When I do that you see they come down in the morning, give it all the "isn't he a good boy" stuff, a pat on the head, a little treat, and only get to find out about my little misdemeanour about half an hour later. Went walkies round Jacob Smith Park this morning, which was fun, but got stuck behind white van man on the way back. Emblazoned across the back of his van was one of those stupid made up words that really get my goat. They think that it makes them sound important. Today's word was "ulitergy". What does that mean then? This guy was apparently an expert in utilergy. It's easy to say that you are an expert in something that nobody has ever heard of, that way they can't disprove your audacious claim. I'm an expert in poohcology me.
You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.