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Sweaty Socks

You can always rely on a "Sweaty Sock" to let you down can't you? Much the same as the England football team. Mind you, at least the England football team do get to the finals of major tournaments. Finals, not the final, that would be just too bizarre. The thing that bamboozled me a bit about Murray was that he did everything totally the wrong way round. Winning the first set, going close in the second, then rapidly capitulating after he slipped on a carelessly discarded banana skin. If he'd actually read the Jock Sportsmanship Manual he'd have discovered that it reads like this: 1) get miles behind right from the start, losing 5-0 to Honduras is a good beginning. 2) sneak a streaky 1-1 draw against someone like the Faroe Islands or Lichtenstein with a flukey deflection in injury time. 3) Now you need to beat Brazil 15-0 to get through. Against all the odds you are 14-0 up with 15 minutes to go. You then have a hotly disputed clear penalty disallowed, as the ref waves play on Brazil run down the other end and stick 15 past your hapless goalkeeper, Titch McPhee, in the last ten minutes and you lose 14-15, pack your bags and go home to a hero's welcome. Job done. Wait another 40 years and repeat.

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