What does a South Korean use to take his dog out? Oven gloves! I can't believe they eat dogs over there really, the dirty bastards, isn't it just an urban myth? Like Elvis working down the chippie, or Lord Lucan riding the winner of the 3.45 at Catterick? Or that Jeremy Corbyn was in Hawkwind and was also Father Abraham in the Smurfs? What he REALLY was in fucking Hawkwind and was Father Bastard Abraham? Are you taking the piss? Hmmmm. Gives me an idea though....Knocker, here boy, you know that new Korean restaurant in town, they're looking for a guard dog....
You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.