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I am the new James Bond

Guess what? I am in the running to be the new James Bond.

OK; it's not official yet, but Mr Broccoli's people have had words with my people ... so watch this space.

If we can consider a gay James Bond - ooooh -  or an LGBT James, or even a dwarf, then why not have a border terrier?


In these - equal opportunities times - border terriers have been shamefully overlooked by the acting world. If Daniel Craig can't be arsed to do the next one - no problem, I'll step in to do it. All I need is a small signing on fee; and my own Hollywood trailer filled with biscuits.

If they want to lay on some hot girl doggies in bikinis; I'm up for that too - if you catch my drift. I've been practicing raising my ... eyebrows.

Q branch have already designed the new car. It's not electric, it's paw powered so it'll keep that eco warrior, Greta Thunberg lot, happy.



Fuckin' get in, You Only Bark Twice ... Woof Woof ! Double-Oh behave.

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