Junior Toddler Chef - Episode 2

Well after last week's unsurprising elimination of little Alfie Suggs, who shit himself during the Technical Round, there are still plenty of contestants left. 

Here's little Bratella Johnson, she's a vegan, gluten intolerant, people intolerant and doesn't like being asked to do anything. She's going to fuckin' struggle in Pie Week then if she doesn't like meat or wheat. 

After all Mummy 'wheat is murder', all those fields full of crops makes me sick. Plus that goldfish you got for me from the fun fair  -"how would you like to go round in a circle all day in a tiny cramped space?". After Mummy pointed out that they live in a council flat in Swindon, she does know exactly what that's like you little cow. Undeterred Bratella decided to make her pork pie from some nettles with a soggy tofu crust, earning her a now infamous Paul Bollywood headbutt.

What we need now are few more PC contestants, like Winston Cadogo who may just possibly be of Caribbean origin, Ali Snackbar and of course a few more unfortunate types. Shite TV.

Quick joke. What's the best thing to come out of Swindon? The M4 ! Woof