The Year of the Dog

Hey it's Chinese New Year; and 2018 is the Year of The Dog.

That gives me the chance to retread one of my Dad's favourite old jokes.

Question: How does a Chinaman take his dog out?
Answer: carefully, and with oven gloves - woof.

Do they really eat dogs in China? I've seen it on telly so it must be true. As they say over there - a dog isn't just for Xmas. If you're lucky they'll be some left over for Boxing Day.

Mind you I wouldn't mind if by chance Tommy 'disappeared' into some Dim Sums or a Chop Suey. That would suit me down to the ground, and I could get the place back all to myself.

Happy New Year - Woof !

Glasto

You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.

my Mum, your Dad

It's a new reality show FFS Endless permutations My Mum, your Dad My Mum, your Mum My Dad, your Dad My Mum, my Dad + your Dad My Mum, your Mum + your Dad Stay woof

it's bin day

I love a by election but only for the nutters who stand in them. I expected the Monster Raving Loony Party but there's a new kid on the block ... Count Binface. So i've been inspired to stand myself as his buddy, Count Benny of Thejets. Just like my inspiration Sir Elton, I'm still standing. My policies include:- Lowering taxes on dog food Campaigning for more poo bins Compulsory banning of cats Gotta go, I ate something 'dodgy' earlier in the park and I think I'm about to lose my deposit! Stay woof

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