Not much to report today, took longer than normal to do the Telegraph crossword this morning as they took my pen off me for weeing in the kitchen again overnight. I could have held on a bit longer I suppose, but hey, I don't have to clean it up do I? Downloaded the latest Lady Gaga album onto my iPod, I'll listen to that later. Is it true that, you know, she used to be a bloke like? I can normally sniff out s shemale at 500 paces me. One of them took me unawares in the park last week, I was none too happy about that I can tell you. Pooh count: 7, and that's without even trying too hard. I am as they say: "on top of me game"
Is a sheepdog and his two-legged is a farmer. Frank was out with him in the tractor drilling wheat last autumn and they unearthed a rusty old lamp. So the farmer hopped out of the cab to have a closer look at it and gave it a little rub on his jacket, as you do, and was amazed to see a genie appear and offer to grant him any wish he wanted. Well the farmer thought for a moment and then said "I'd like the price of wheat to go to £200/tonne!" So the genie sighed but said "OK, I'll sort that out for you then, you greedy bastard" and popped back into his bottle. And the farmer casually tossed the lamp into the back of his cab and got on with his drilling. Well they were out again this morning putting a bit of nitrogen on, Frank and the farmer, and the farmer spotted the lamp and gave it a little rub again, just on the off chance, and you'll never guess what happened, the genie popped out again, and said that he'd grant the farmer one more wish. So the fa...