Mobile phone answer messages that say "after recording your message please hang up." Like what the feck else am I gonna do? Hang on for the rest of the day? Also the bloke who knocked on the door yesterday who was doing a survey on tea, I kid you not. Tea, like you drink from a cup, not what you eat when you get home from work. Not that I work, I'm a border terrier, but like you two-legged lot do. Apart from me Dad. He just sits on his computer playing Space Invaders all day long, the lazy bastard. Anyway this bloke knocks on the door and says "Hello sir, I'm doing a survey about tea, do you drink much tea in your house?" So me Dad gives his stock reply of "no, sorry, it's a rented property," and promptly shut the door. It's all right for you lot, this is what passes for humour round here. Pooh count: seven, almost equalling my personal best, logtastic.
You couldn't make it up could you. I spent much of the weekend dozing on the sofa watching telly. Glastonbury was on, although sad to say there was no Snoop Dog, Bone Jovi or any other canine related artists. The big news seemed to be the lack of female headliners and now we know why as one scored a spectacular own goal. She missed her slot cos she was doing her hair. It takes ages she said. Why NOT start doing your hair well before your show time. Aaagh no where's my handbag I've left it in the car, I've got to back to fetch it.