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Have already forged into a commanding lead for this week's Turd of the Week award. What a bunch of low life scumbags they are. The only thing that surprises me about their antics is why they would think that anyone would be interested in anything left on Vanessa Feltz's voicemail. "It's Pizza Hut here Vanessa, we're running a bit late with your 84" deep crust hot 'n' spicy as the delivery truck's just lost it's back axle." Pooh count: two, a family-sized Toblerone and a Double Decker, just for Vanessa.

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